D'Onofrio v. D'OnofrioD'Onofrio v. D'Onofrio
Following a plenary hearing pursuant to
The court is keenly aware that of all adjudicatory proceedings, none requires greater judicial thoughtfulness nor imposes graver judicial responsibility than the delicate and sensitive litigation which involves the status of young children or which may affect to any substantial degree existing parental relationships. The resolution of the issue here presented, essentially one of visitation, concededly does not implicate the same degree of wrenching emotional content and permanency of consequence inevitably involved in contested adoption and custody actions. It is nevertheless of critical significance to the lives of both of these parents and their children. The issue is also one of sufficient importance to have invoked a clear and long-standing statement of legislative policy, namely, that children of divorced parents not be removed from this jurisdiction without the consent of the non-custodial parent “unless the court, upon cause shown, shall otherwise order.”
It is instructive in dealing with these questions to consider
Thus,
Even under the best of circumstances and where the custodial parent is supportive of a continuing relationship between the child and the noncustodial parent, the nature of a parental relationship sustainable by way of visitation is necessarily and inevitably of a different character than that which is possible where the parents and children reside together as a single-family unit. The fact remains that ordinarily the day-to-day routine of the children, especially young ones, and the quality of their environment and their general style of life are that which are provided by the custodial parent
Where the residence of the new family unit and that of the noncustodial parent are geographically close, some variation of visitation on a weekly basis is traditionally viewed as being most consistent with maintaining the parental relationship, and where, as here, that has been the visitation pattern, a court should be loathe to interfere with it by permitting removal of the children for frivolous or unpersuasive or inadequate reasons. See Grove v. Grove, 26 N.J. Super. 154 (App. Div. 1953). Where, however, the custodial parent can demonstrate that a real advantage to herself and the children will result from their removing their residence to a place so geographically distant as to render weekly visitation impossible, then the court must weigh a number of determinative factors in order to accommodate the compelling interests of all of the family members. It should consider the prospective advantages of the move in terms of its likely capacity for improving the general quality of life for both the custodial parent and the children. It must evaluate the integrity of the motives of the custodial parent in seeking the move in order to determine whether the removal is inspired primarily by the desire to defeat or frustrate visitation by the noncustodial parent, and whether the custodial parent is likely to comply with substitute visitation orders when she is no longer subject to the jurisdiction of the courts of this State. It must
It is further clear that a noncustodial parent is perfectly free to remove himself from this jurisdiction despite the continued residency here of his children in order to seek opportunities for a better or different life style for himself. And if he does choose to do so, the custodial parent could hardly hope to restrain him from leaving this State on the ground that his removal will either deprive the children of the paternal relationship or depreciate its quality. The custodial parent, who bears the essential burden and responsibility for the children, is clearly entitled to the same option to seek a better life for herself and the children, particularly where the exercise of that option appears to be truly advantageous to their interests and provided that the paternal
Relating these observations to the facts here as found and hereafter recited, the court is satisfied that the move here contemplated should be allowed.
Mrs. D‘Onofrio now resides with the children in an apartment in Garfield, New Jersey, which is located on a busy and heavily trafficked street and which has no suitable and convenient play area. The rental of $235 a month for minimal housing accommodations is unfortunately consistent with the general housing market in Bergen County. At the time of the divorce in 1973 her husband, a policeman employed by the Borough of Lodi, was ordered to pay alimony in the amount of $10 a week and child support in the amount of $20 a week per child. He is now paying a total of $53 weekly pursuant to an escalation formula contained in the judgment. Formerly in receipt of a welfare grant to supplement the support paid by the father, she is now employed by the Bergen County Welfare Board as a home service aid at a take-home pay of $90 a week. In addition, her job entitles her to child care facilities at the Welfare Board‘s expense while she works. Although she is a trained bookkeeper, she cannot find employment in that field at a salary high enough to compensate her for the child care assistance she
Born in Rock Hill, South Carolina, where most of her large family still resides, Mrs. D‘Onofrio came to New Jersey when she was 11 years old. She was married here and the children were born here. Although her father still lives in New Jersey, he is planning to return to Rock Hill upon his retirement within the next year. Her mother, who has been supportive of her and the children both financially and otherwise, is now also in Rock Hill, nursing her own mother in what appears to be a terminal illness, and will either remain there to await her husband‘s arrival or will return here temporarily to make the permanent move with him. Despite the distance between Mrs. D‘Onofrio and her family in Rock Hill, they have remained close throughout the years. The children, having frequently visited Rock Hill, are confident and happy there and, to the limited extent that they understand what is involved, look forward to the move.
Mrs. D‘Onofrio finds her situation difficult, and with obvious justification. She is employed, taking care of the children essentially on a 24 hour a day basis, has barely enough income to meet the family‘s needs, and is receiving from her former husband not only minimal financial support but also very little support and assistance in the burdens of raising the children. Although she has genuinely attempted to maintain herself and her children in New Jersey, she has now concluded that they would manage better by returning permanently to Rock Hill. She has found employment there as a bookkeeper for a chemical company
Now as to the paternal considerations. The father, since the divorce, has been seeing the children every Friday, on birthdays and holidays. He sometimes picks them up at their home, but more often Mrs. D‘Onofrio takes them to his parents’ home, which appears to be the visitation headquarters. Although he spends time with them there, he frequently leaves them for part of the day with their grandmother, with whom Mrs. D‘Onofrio enjoys a cordial relationship. Mrs. D‘Onofrio, who candidly admits that the children love their father, has repeatedly asked him to keep them with him overnight, but he has never yet done so, claiming both that the fact of his employment is inconsistent with such an arrangement and that, having remarried, he doesn‘t have room for them. His claimed net income from his municipal employment after payment of taxes, alimony and support is in excess of $8,000. There are no children of the present marriage. His second wife works, but her income was not indicated. Mrs. D‘Onofrio suggested, but he denied, that he earns additional income by moonlighting. As to his attitude toward the proposed move, the court accepts Mrs. D‘Onofrio‘s testimony, despite her former husband‘s variant version, that when she first discussed it with him, he had no objection provided she would agree to forego the weekly child support and would arrange to transport the children to New Jersey for visitation at Christmas, Easter and during the summer.
In view of all of the foregoing, this court is satisfied that the mother has shown the required cause. She has expressed her desire, not merely her willingness, to transport the children to New Jersey so that they can spend two weeks with their father during the summer, one week at Christmas and one week in the spring. The court has ordered her to do so and is confident of her intent to comply with that order. Hopefully, the father will be able to make arrangements to accommodate them even though those visits will make greater demands of him than the weekly visits he now shares with his mother. The order also accords him liberal visitation in South Carolina and further permits him to withhold $15 a week of his support payments to create a